Sitting Here, Stopping

sitting here

quiet

not knowing what to write

why am I here?

unsure

breathing

sad

I look out the window

brilliant dazzling white snow in sunlight

I smile

breathe again

I see my cat

I see You

I breathe again

I hear the laundry machine

I feel my arms

breathing

waiting

wondering

accepting

smiling

can I love what is?

I suppose that is a choice

I suppose I'm free to choose to love what is or not

do I?

no, not really, and that's why I'm sad

stopping

I want to stop notloving what is

breathing

whatever I'm doing to interfere with love of what is...I am stopping it now

I laugh

I smile

can I continue with that thought?  habit wants to creep in again, immediately!

I choose to continue thinking this thought

which thought? where did it go? what was it again?

hmmmm

ah, yes...
I do not like this present moment, as it is

I am choosing to stop whatever I'm doing to interfere with my loving what is

I am stopping that 

it works: I am smiling again, and another laugh escapes

and another

and another

I want to continue with this

I ask for help to continue with this

smiling

breathing

letting myself not know many many many things

letting myself not understand

just stopping what blocks me from loving what is

again and again and again.

----

the above thought process was a spontaneous application of the Three Simple Steps outlined in this blogpost:  http://balanceandharmonyat.blogspot.com/2011/06/three-simple-steps.html

Positive Directions for Mind-Body Freedom

Without moving the body to try to feel whether the following thoughts have an effect on your system or not, just go ahead and think them.  Slowly, one at a time, with awareness of the meaning of the words, and in the specific order suggested.  As you add each new direction, continue to be aware of the previous direction(s) at the same time.  Alexander said, "One after another, all together."  We pay attention to parts (analysis), and we also pay attention to the whole (synthesis).  This activity is the best kind of concentration, leading to a unified field of attention, one which aims to include everything.

• I am free (the will is free, the mind-body is free, I am free to be)
• I know where I am in space  (I know where all possible directions are in relation to the body:  I know where up is, I know where down is, forward, back, left, right, left, inside, outside, etc. )
• The neck is free (to be as it is)
• I am aware of forward & up (particularly in relation to the head)
• The torso is free (to be as it is, to breathe, to expand)
• The knees are aiming forward & away (from the torso)
• Heels to the ground, crown to the sky (aware that everything in between is free to be)
• I am free

Go back to the beginning and repeat as often as desired:

• I am free
• I know where I am in space
• The neck is free
• I am aware of forward & up
• The torso is free
• The knees are aiming forward & away
• Heels to the ground, crown to the sky
• I am free

Here's an abbreviated version:

• I am free
• The neck is free
• Forward & up
• Torso expanding
• Knees forward & away

It may also be helpful to add the following after "I am free":  

• to choose
• to be ... as I am ... right now ... here ... Me
• to love ... to live ... to be energized
• to smile ... to enjoy mySelf ... to be happy
• to breathe ... to move
• to experiment ... explore ... wonder ... create
• to feel any feelings, no matter what they are
• to be conscious

Sharing Love

We humans are beings capable of enormous--even infinite--Love.

To actively share the experience of this Love with others is the source of our greatest joy.
To feel that our expression of this Love is not fully received by others is the source of our greatest grief.

In order to experience the greatest heights of joy, we must be willing to share our Love freely, and take the risk that it may not be fully received.
We must be willing to endure the greatest depths of grief in order to live the most beautiful life of Love.

Alexander Technique can help us become aware of the many ways that we block the experience of Love within ourselves, both the giving of it and the receiving of it.

When we are afraid to feel, we block some of the flow of Love within us; we contract, shrink, fight, flee, and freeze...all to avoid feeling the extreme feelings borne of Love.

In order to Love, we must know that we are free to do so.
To live a life of Love is a choice.
To share Love is a choice.
But the price of choosing anything but Love is a choice away from living the full richness of life, towards deadening and hardening, numbness and pain.

The way to escape the suffering of the human condition is to live and love for the sake of Love, not for the sake of having it received or shared or returned.  That kind of "end-gaining" inevitably leads to disappointment and suffering.

We can choose to inhibit the desire/need for Love to come to us from without.
We can choose to allow/direct Love to flow and live within and without, for us and for others...in every moment.
These choices bring real happiness that is always accessible, always reliable, always trustworthy.
This is "good use" of the self.

One Simple Thought-Drop

One thought at a time is enough
One simple thought, simply thought, is most effective

Aware of thinking
I can choose my thought

I wish my mind to be still and clear
So that I can simply think one simple thought most effectively

Aware of a jumble of thoughts in my body-mind
Like a turbulent lake tossed about by a stormy wind

I am the lake, I am the wind, I am the turbulence
Now I stop the jumble

How?
I think one simple thought at a time, each of the above

One after another
All together

The waves slowly stop their tossing and turning about
And the lake becomes calmer, calmer

I am not sending more thought-waves, just this one
And the lake-mind-body becomes still

One thought-drop at a time, dropped into the calm lake
Sends orderly ripples to all sides of the lake

Slowly, the ripples of this one, simple thought
Reach every corner of my body-mind

This is true con-centration
One simple thought sending circular ripples in all directions

Ordering the universe of my being, which lies at the center of the Universe
Because Infinitude extends out from my center in every direction

I become organized
Around One Simple Thought

Dropped into the silent stillness
Of Infinite Being

On Prayer and AT

What do the words "pray" and "prayer" mean to you?
Do they trigger a reaction in you, of any kind?

Take a moment to inhibit (pause to not-react), if you will.
Take a moment to create a space of nonjudgmental observation around these words and your relation to them.

Now, if you are curious about your beliefs and reactions related to these words, go ahead and read the following poem.

"Pray - period! Don't expect anything.
Or better, expect nothing.
Prayer cleanses us of expectations
 and allows holy will, providence,
and life itself an entry.
What could be more worth the effort -
or the non-effort?"
-  Thomas Moore

Don't expect anything.
Expect nothing.
Cleansing ourselves of expectations.
Allowing.
Allowing the holy will (isn't the innermost, deepest essence, Self, holy?)...an entry.
Allowing providence (guardianship, control)...an entry.
Allowing life to enter into us.
Effort/non-effort.


What if prayer, thought of in this way, were not so different from what we mean in Alexander "jargon", when we consider the words "inhibition" and "direction" and "conscious control of the individual" and "not endgaining" and "non-doing"...all with a view towards knowing the Self?

The Most Valuable Knowledge

"...the most valuable knowledge we can possess 
is that of the use and functioning of the self, 
and of the means 
whereby the human individual 
may progressively raise 
the standard of his health and general well-being."


- F.M. Alexander


What is knowledge?
What makes something more or less valuable?
What is meant by the self?
How does the self function?
How can the self be used?
What is the human individual?
What is progress?
What is a standard?
What is meant by and included in health and general well-being? 


These are all questions which may be asked while exploring the Alexander Technique.


Is it possible to be absolutely certain about our answers?
Is there a limit, or are these words merely indicators, signposts that aim us in a certain direction, towards the Unknown, into Mystery?

Are you free?

Are you free?

Take a moment and think it through.  Keep it simple.  What does being "free" mean to you?  What is the opposite of that?

Notice, I am not asking, "Do you feel free?"  Is your response to the question "Are you free?" really answering the question "Are you feeling free?"  There's a big difference.  The question, "Are you free?"  is about how you identify with the 'being' of your essential nature.  Is this nature--are you--free or not?

If you're having difficulty answering this question, or if you've decided that you are not free, consider this one: "Do you have free will?"

What does that mean to you?  To me, "free will" means that, in any given moment, I can be aware of having a choice before me, and I have the freedom to make one.  When I am conscious of this free will, I  identify myself as being free.  No matter whether I feel free or not.

When I think, "I am free," and I really believe/know that, I tend to orient myself in a direction which will help me eventually (or maybe right away!) feel free; even though I may not feel free at all at the outset.

I think it is a habit to believe that we are not free, and therefore experience many moments in our life during which we feel enslaved, without the freedom to choose our responses to what life brings our way.  In my opinion, this is an error, an illusion, a habitual way of thinking which is not logical or in accordance with the reality of the state of being human.  I know from experience that I, as a human being endowed with free will, am essentially free, and always free to make choices.

What you think is what you get.  If the habit is to (consciously or unconsciously) think/believe "I am not free", you will eventually (sometimes immediately) feel that you are not free.  And, since our habit is to base ourselves--our concept of who we are--on our feelings instead of our reasoning, our feelings will end up convincing us that we actually are not free, even if that is not in accordance with the reality of our deepest being.

On the contrary, if we become accustomed to thinking/believing "I am free," we will end up by feeling free, sooner or later.  We all feel better and happier when we feel truly free/released/liberated, so I think this sense of freedom is something worth aspiring to, through developing our awareness of it.

I, personally, want to think and believe "I am free" because I know from experience that it has a positive effect on my whole being.  It rings true, and it coordinates my whole mind, body, and soul in a way that makes me happy.  To me, this is a good reason to practice developing the new habit of thinking which relies on my understanding that I am free--under any and all circumstances.

It's my choice to realize that I am free or not, just as it is your choice to realize your own freedom or not.

All it takes is discernment, and one thought, "I am free"; and then deciding to follow through on that thought over time.

---

I have a student who, after I explained this, exclaimed in some frustration, "But it can't be so simple!"

I think it is this simple.

It's as simple as making a fist through the conscious intention to make the hand tight, and then releasing the fist-squeeze by thinking/willing the hand's release.

To think "I am not free" is like making a fist/cage for our whole self (body/mind/soul), while to think "I am free" releases the whole of who we are.

The difference, perhaps, lies only in the imagined/believed simplicity of releasing a hand.  We may think that creating/releasing a fist is simple because we can literally see the hand, and think of it as something small and isolated, but is it really?  Isn't a hand as infinitely complex in its minute details as any other organism?  And, isn't it just as connected to the rest of the body as any other part, or parts put together?

If we can make and a release a fist through a simple thought, we can do the same for the whole body.

What is not always a simple matter, though, is to set aside the belief that it isn't this simple for long enough to try it out and experience positive results!

Yes, I am free, and yes, it is that simple.

It makes me smile!